Vitamin Supplements

I take a multi vitamin everyday, and i also take iron tablets because my iron count is low down to how much ideprived myself before :-/ but it's going up :D lol
anyway, my post today is about taking vitamin supplements, yes i think it's a good idea, and it's wonderful for helping you with your recovery becauseyour body really really needs all those nutrients! However, to actually absorb all these vitamins you must must MUST eat a varied diet. And also one with good amounts of calories and fats in it, otherwise the vitamins simply won't be absorbed and won't make a difference i'm afraid :(
I have noticed my skin and hair has drastically improved, i think it's down to eating right and well, plus taking my good ol' multivitamin everyday!! lol have a lovely weekend everyone :) hopefully it's sunnier where you are than where i am...sigh have to get my vitamin D from a pill and not the sun :( xxxx

Always feeling Angry...(poem)

I first felt angry because i felt too fat.
I felt angry because i felt i couldn't lose weight.
I felt angry because i couldn't resist.
Then, I felt angry because i never ate.

I felt angry because no one understood.
I felt angry because no matter how little i ate i never looked or felt any good.

I felt angry because i looked too thin, couldn't fit into clothes...
couldn't let anyone in.

I felt angry all the time.
Then i ate...then i felt fine.

Random short poem i made, i realised today that i was so angry because no matter what, with anoreixa i never actually achieved anything worth achieving. Once you have lost all the weight, whats left? Nothing. That's the scary thing...

Life's too short...

I was thinking today how crazy it is to concerntrate on food sooo much? I have my A level exams coming up, and i was sitting there in the lesson thinking about lunch, i mean honestly i have wasted most of this past year just thinking about food, when it comes down to it, theres sooo much more to life, food is just meant to be the fuel that keeps us going. Yes i understand that having a job such as a chef would make you think about food more than the average person...but i'm not a chef!! lol From now on i promised myself i am going to throw myself into mywork (very behind :-/ ) and just get on with it, although food is your friend, not the enemy, it's not human either and shouldn't take up so much brain space! Think about that gorgeous boy that lives down the street or your favorite program! I don't know if anyone thinks about food as much as i do, but i'm trying to stop now...life's just too short!!

Your Amazing, and this is why!

The fact that you have even considered to look at this blog is one thing, even CONSIDERING recovery makes you incredibly strong. The only way to describe it is like snow white trying to defeat the hulk...i think recovering from and eating disorder is harder than people think, some say 'why don't you just eat.' That's ridiculous. These disorders are about the mind and (in my opinion) conquering your own mind is quite possibly one of the hardest things imaginable.
But possible.
You can recover from this, but you need to want to with everything you've got. Your amazing for taking this on, and i hope each and every one of you beat your deamons ass and find happiness again :)

                                                        

xxxx

Look it's you!! Not that your square or anything.....(bad joke sorry, couldn't resist lol)

How many Calories do you need?

I was so confused when it came to how many calories i was meant to be consuming per day, kept hearing so many different things! To be honest i still struggle to fully understand it all lol but this calculator i found on the internet and it seems to be the most accurate, i have been told things from 1,600 to 2,770 calories!! lol
http://walking.about.com/cs/calories/l/blcalcalc.htm
heres the link to the calculator i used, i got 1,770 to maintain, so i try to eat around 2,000 everyday to make sure i gain...hope this helps you get a better idea of how much you need!! xxx

Stop thinking about it...

At the start of recovery, i was told to keep a food diary and write down everything i ate and how it made me 'feel' doctors also told me to not concerntrate on food...contredictive maybe?!! lol so i did the food diary, but it drove me bonkers!! i think if you have any chance of recovering you need to not put so much emphasis on what you eat etc...i'm now at the stage where i can actually eat something and wait for it....forget i've eaten it :-O i haven't done that in a very, very, VERY long time lol
I have also figured out a way to handle high fat/calorie meals...for example yesterday for lunch my stepmum made heaps of pasta with a chicken and mushroom sauce made with extra thick double cream, when i saw that ad to say i panicked a bit...but you need to take it one step at a time. So had the plate in front of me, started eating, and it tasted good, then the grated cheese was passed around and i added some, i ended up having more cheese than everyone else AND ate some of my dads pasta :) step by step does the trick, and NEVER EVER FEEL GUILTY FOR EATING. your body deserves it now, it's been deprived for too long!! xxxx